What If Instead of Leaning In, We Started Letting Go?

For years, I believed the story we were all told — that if I just leaned in harder, spoke louder, pushed further, and powered through, I could have it all. Success seemed like a formula: work harder, say yes, keep climbing. But when the formula failed, I doubled down, and so do most leaders. More meetings, more dashboards, more pressure. Eventually, we wake up exhausted, disconnected, and wondering why doing more delivers less.

The problem is not effort — it is method. One of the most damaging myths in leadership is the belief that authority equals control. Titles, paychecks, and power do not give us control over people, their motivation, or their results. What drives behavior inside organizations is not workflows or dashboards — it is beliefs. Beliefs about the company, the leaders, the mission, and themselves. And those beliefs are shaped by lived experiences — the signals we send as leaders, the recognition we give, the actions we model, and the decisions we reward or ignore.

Lasting results come when leaders focus on shaping those experiences. When people believe their work matters, they choose ownership. That is why I do what I do at Culture Partners — we help leaders shift beliefs to unlock results. Because results are not dictated from the top down; they are built from the inside out. Maybe the path forward is not pushing harder. Maybe it is knowing when to let go.

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